Day 84: Enormous Loss in the Time of Corona

Day 84: June 18, 2020
Global Cases:  8,570,384 Deaths: 455,575
Egypt Cases:  50,437 Deaths: 1,938

Nadine Aboulmagd
Senior Instructional Designer, Center for Learning and Teaching

Pandemic. Isolation. Anxiety. Grief. Sadness. Loneliness. Uncertainty. Unpredictability. Unprecedented. Inexperience.

There is no one way to describe this time. There are not enough words in the world that could sufficiently portray this experience the world is going through.

I’ve chosen to dedicate this piece to my late and beloved cousin, Tarek Aboulmagd. The loss is indescribable. The circumstances, dreadful.

Suddenly and sadly, we lost my cousin Tarek Aboulmagd on Saturday May 30, 2020. It has been such a difficult time to go through this. Not only because of losing him so soon, but also because of our inability to announce the funeral and memorial to avoid gatherings as a result of COVID-19 and the risk that poses to everyone in the family, especially the elders. Hence the family wasn’t able to accept in-person condolences, which often actually help families avoid remaining alone and retreating to their thoughts of sadness especially in the immediate days after losing a loved one.

So this difficult loss was magnified as a result of the enforced isolation. People deal with grief differently, but being able to receive hugs, cry on someone’s shoulder or even spend time with your relatives and friends goes a long way for everybody. None of this could happen now.

Tarek was such a sweet person (or is, I still find it hard to refer to him in the past tense, because I do believe he is still with us). He was so loved, by everyone; friends, family, relatives, and everyone who has ever met him. I saw proof of that whenever I met anyone new. They would notice our last name resemblance and ask if I knew or am related to Tarek Aboulmagd and I would be so proud to say, “yes, he is my cousin”.

This was always followed by people saying how incredible of a person he is. He never had a frown on his face. He was always smiling, always making jokes, and making people laugh. I remember an instance during my uncle’s funeral where I was crying, he found a way to make a joke to make me laugh even when we were both experiencing another family member’s loss. He was always talking about people in the sweetest way possible. This is what his character was like, and this is how he will always be remembered.

Whenever I heard the statement “Life is too short” I would brush it off and it just ended up being one of those phrases you hear constantly but never actually listen to. Take a moment and read that again.

For The Caravan‘s previous diary entries in Arabic and English go to our COVID-19 Special Coverage page. 

I would like to end this on a positive note. With a reminder to everyone reading this. If you love someone, tell them. If you miss someone, call them. If you don’t like something, say it. If you are unhappy with your life, make a change. If you are stressed, find ways to unwind. If you want something, ask for it.

Living a fulfilled life is all about going after what you want, not waiting around for opportunities to go by. One of the quotes that really resonates with me is, “Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life” from Robin Sharma, a bestselling author. Regardless how many years your time on this earth ends up being, make the most of it.

Tarek lived a full life. We all can learn from that. Especially in this time of COVID-19, with all this uncertainty about what the future holds. Life hasn’t stopped or paused like many may believe. Everyday that passes, is your life. So make sure you live a life that you are proud of and happy to have lived.

Even in the tough times, remain mindful and present. The Buddha said, “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” And I truly believe that mindfulness can get us through this, day by day, moment by moment, remaining present as best we can.

Please take a moment, in your sincerest way, to pray for Tarek’s soul and for his family. No matter how you say the prayer, it would go a long way.